If you’re standing in an Irish-themed pub come March 17th, staring at your green-dyed beer and thinking, There must be a better way, rest assured—there is. To celebrate St. Patrick’s Day the authentic way—soused—you not only have to think like an Irishman, you have to drink like an Irishman. To do that, consult this field guide of Irish spirits and where to find them. Now all you have to do is pick your poison.
Whiskey: That’s whiskey with an “e”—a distinction made in the 1870s when Scottish distilleries were essentially making swill (whisky) and the prideful Irish wanted to protect their superior product with this degree of separation. Today, the only real difference between the two (aside from spelling) is that the Scots dry their malt over an open peat fire for its characteristic smoky flavor, whereas the Irish do not, giving their whiskey a cleaner, purer profile. Surprisingly, Ireland only has three major distilleries that together produce the multitude of varieties on the market, the most popular being Jameson, which flows like water (indeed, the word whiskey comes from the Gaelic phrase uisce beatha which means "water of life") at revisionist Irish pub Puck Fair (pictured). There, you can also sip a wee dram of Bushmills and Tullamore Dew. At Whiskey Ward, try all three in a whiskey flight of one-ounce pours presented on a wooden panel. But if it’s those rare labels like Paddy’s, Locke’s and Connemara you seek, head to Failte Irish Whiskey Bar, which boasts over 20 brands.
Irish Beer: Though it may be the most well-known Irish beer, Guinness sure doesn’t travel well—it’s said that the only true way to drink it is straight from the source at the St. James Gate brewery in Dublin. But this is New York, so we’ll have to make do, and it’s said that Swift Bar in the East Village and the Bronx’s An Beal Bocht both pull a pretty near-perfect pint (double pour at 6 degrees, please). For those not willing to settle for second best, megapub Stout carries less-finicky beers like Murphy’s Irish Stout, Smithwicks Ale and Harp Lager on tap, plus Beamish, O’Haras Celtic and Murphy’s Irish Red by the bottle. Another spot for one-stop sipping of Irish suds is Stout’s sister bar The Half Pint, in Greenwich Village, which offers “wee taster flights” of five 8-ounce sample pours of any draft.
Hard Cider: Just like an Irish immigrant, Ireland’s flagship hard cider, Bulmer’s, had to change its name once it got to the states (jokes aside, the reason was a legal one so it wouldn't be confused with a same-named English cider). Known as Magner’s stateside, it can be found at most beer bars and Irish pubs, including Brass Monkey, the pretense-free gastropub in, of all places, the Meatpacking District, as well as Lansdowne Road, a Hell’s Kitchen watering hole named for the rugby stadium in Dublin. Be sure to request it over ice, which is the proper, traditional way it’s served in the old country.
Cream Liqueur: When Baileys came out in 1974, it was the first of its kind to combine Irish whiskey with a cream-based liqueur. Since then, plenty of imitators have cropped up, yet it’s Baileys rich chocolate, caramel and vanilla notes that reign supreme behind the bar—in fact, you’ll have a hard time finding any substitutes for the original at places like Ryan’s Daughter on the Upper East Side, which serves a mean Gaelic coffee. You can also sip a Baileys on the rocks while listening to live music at Woodside’s Saints and Sinners, but then again, do you really want to be caught dead doing so in public? It’s probably best to head to Columbia Wine Co., which also stocks Emmets, Carolans (a rich, fudgey version made with mead-wine, cream and honey) and St. Brendan’s Irish Creams to drink in the privacy of your own apartment. We promise we won’t tell anyone.
Mead: This ancient golden nectar made by fermenting honey, water and yeast with herbs, spices or flowers is thought to have been first made in the medieval times by Irish monks. It’s since had deep cultural roots in the Irish tradition, especially throughout Gaelic folklore. Though Bunratty Meade, made from white wine, honey and herbs in County Clare is the real deal, Manhattan Meadery’s Brooklyn Buzz made with artisanal honey sourced from the Finger Lakes is a fine substitute, which can be found at the Chelsea Wine Vault. If you'd like to go public, Dogfish Head has the Midas Touch at Blind Tiger Ale House, sprinkled with notes of barley, saffron and grapes.
Alcopops: Alcopops is a fancy term for pre-mixed, flavored alcoholic beverages that boil down to water, sugar, food coloring, juice and alcohol, but you’re more likely to recognize them as your drink of choice circa high school—remember Mike’s Hard Lemonade and Smirnoff Ice? Yup, this would be them. They're popular to a fault with the younguns in Ireland, and you can relive your rebellious youth at the Park Slope Chip Shop, which sells 12-ounce bottles of Woody’s Alcopops in Cranberry and Blueberry. If anyone looks at you askance, you can tell them you’re simply supporting the Emerald Isle—Woody’s is made in Belfast.
Photo by Sam Horine
