The front cover image of local sex educator/author Jamye Waxman's new book 'Getting Off'
(Credit: Courtesy of Seal Press)
Pleasure-seekers in New York City, this fall there’s a class for you. In response to customer demands, sex educators and gurus have amped up their erotic curriculums, with classes on everything from giving head to bondage tricks. The outlook is especially good for rookie kinksters and orgasm-deprived ladies.
But why now?
Carolyn Riccardi, the marketing coordinator for New York’s female-friendly sex toy store Babeland, says the general comfort level about coming into a public space to attend sexuality workshops has increased and, in turn, created a market for new and more risqué offerings. Since the progressive sex institution started holding classes in NYC when it opened its Mercer Street location four years ago, the attendance has doubled, from an average of 30 to 60 participants. “We also doubled the number of workshops we offer each year to 24,” says Riccardi. “And the classes are all full!”
In the beginning, classes such as Sex Toys 101 and Anal 101 were considered the “cutting-edge of our workshop program,” says Riccardi. This year, Babeland’s education agenda has expanded to include “Fantasy and Filth,” a workshop that explores aspects of role playing, costume, theater and sensation play, and “Bend Over Boyfriend,” a class explicitly for heterosexual women who are looking to penetrate their male partners. The New York location also held its first “Becoming Orgasmic” class for women in September.
Still, there exists a largely unmet need for classes that focus more on female pleasure and women’s bodies, says former Babeland sex educator and independent author Jamye Waxman. Thus, her forthcoming guidebook, “Getting Off: A Woman’s Guide to Masturbation,” which hits stores Nov. 1, aims to show women, in step-by-step Rachael Ray style, how to explore their bodies and (literally) get off. What’s more: The book is the prelude to Waxman’s forthcoming body-sex workshops, also coming this November. Though the first class won’t be “hands on,” Waxman credits sex-education pioneer Betty Dodson, who led masturbation workshops for women in the 1970s.
“It’ll cover anatomy and go over sex toys and different ways you can masturbate,” says Waxman. “When you see a lot of women’s-magazine articles, it’s still a lot of ‘How to please your partner.’ We talk a lot about pleasing our partner, even in classes and such, but we don’t focus a lot on helping ourselves.”
It’s partially out of necessity that feminist entrepreneurs like Waxman have taken the initiative to develop workshops to help women help themselves.
One problem that has kept classes on pleasuring women like “Cunnilingus Basics” from flourishing is that men don’t usually attend such classes. Meanwhile, women-only “Fellatio” classes always fill up quickly, says Christan Marashio, founder of Moxie in The City, a networking organization that hosts workshops in more than a dozen cities (with the highest concentration of classes in New York City) to help connect people romantically, socially and professionally.
Says Marashio: “If you can get a bunch of men to get into a classroom and talk about these issues, my God, I want you to work for me!”
Fortunately, Moxie’s dating workshops tend to draw members of both sexes.
The outlet plans to continue its successful BJ class this fall, with one led by none other than Waxman in early November. Additionally, Marashio is putting the final touches on what may be Moxie’s most risqué workshop yet: an “Intimate Encounters” class that delves into casual sex and how to get “connected” safely. (And yes, the class will cover physical safety “so you don’t get your hands chopped off and stuffed in a box somewhere,” Marashio says).
Though such new classes will undoubtedly get more than one New Yorker’s blood rushing, Marashio stresses the challenge of finding venues that’ll allow for borderline-taboo content.
But the New York City, even that’s beginning to change as the classes continue to grow, she says.
“People come into the rooms and feel like they’re the only ones experiencing a certain issue or challenge, and walk out feeling like they’re not.”
Sex Ed: where to get some
Babeland: The pro-chick institution is loaded with toys, book signings and workshops.
Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts: The lovely sex and love guru/author Mama Gena teaches ladies techniques on taming men, flirting and other fine social arts.
Moxie in the City: Whether you’re 35 and looking for love or 25 and looking for a good time, Moxie’s likely got a class for you.
Jamye Waxman: The sex educator and author plans to start offering classes to women in November.
Sexy Spirits: The sex-positive education center specializes in the “upraising of consciousness through Tantric and Taoist sexual cultivation practices” and classes like “Expanded Orgasm.”
