'How to Be' review

Robert Pattinson (Credit: IFC)

Supermarket clerk and aspiring musician Arthur (Robert Pattinson) is struggling with a self-diagnosed "quarterlife crisis" brought on by emotionally distant parents (Michael Irving and David Mamet regular Rebecca Pidgeon) and a general sense of aimlessness. When he writes a letter explaining his situation to Dr. Levi Ellington (Powell Jones), the Canadian author of self-help book "It's Not Your Fault," Arthur is surprised to hear that the doctor plans to make a personal house call to help him out.

The buzz: Originally just a twee British indie that won a minor prize at the 2008 Slamdance film festival, "How to Be" suddenly became something more when Pattinson turned into an overnight sensation last year with his role in blockbuster vampire romance "Twilight." Still, the expectations for this movie's appeal aren't too high—it's bypassing theaters for an exclusive On Demand premiere from IFC Festival Direct.
 
The verdict: Single-mindedly focused on a young man wallowing in self-imposed depression, "How to Be" plays like a micro-budgeted British "Garden State" minus the toxic narcissism and adorable pixie love interest (there is a cute grade school teacher, but she barely registers). First-time filmmaker Oliver Irving's heart is in the right place, but he's crafted a practice piece, not a real movie. Scenes drag on with no direction or energy—the camera often remains in a fixed position throughout lackluster exchanges of dialogue—resulting in a work that's as dull and drab visually as it is narratively. Even at only 85 minutes, it's a chore to endure. Pidgeon, the only performer of note besides Pattinson, is every bit as stylized as she is in Mamet's films, but her delivery sounds foolish without any legitimately clever one-liners for support. At least she brings something to the role, which is more than can be said for any of the other supporting players. Fortunately for everyone involved, viewership will likely be limited to Pattinson's hardcore fans, happy to see a movie simply because he's in it. His performance is adequate—nothing special but nothing embarrassing—and it won't hurt that the role perfectly fits the introverted, awkward artist persona he's cultivated in the media. Fans who love "RPattz" even more than Edward Cullen should be satisfied. They'll be the only ones.

Did you know? In the spirit of striking while the iron's hot, the "How to Be" soundtrack will be released in time for the film's On Demand premiere. It boasts three songs with vocals by Pattinson and numerous other tracks featuring "film dialogue performed by Robert Pattinson." Sadly, they could not meet fan demands to include Pattinson himself with every purchase.