'The Canyon' review

Yvonne Strahovski (Credit: Magnolia)

Newlyweds Nick (Eion Bailey) and Lori (Yvonne Strahovski) decide to spend their honeymoon getting all hot and sweaty...with a trek to the Grand Canyon. When they realize they don't have the necessary permits, they befriend a shady barfly (Will Patton) who offers to be their guide. You know things are gonna get screwy when (a) your guide looks scruffier than your donkey, and (b) he shows up for the trek with a bottle of whiskey in hand.

The buzz: Consider this your handy guide on how to pack for the trip from hell: Sunscreen (for optimum UV protection when stranded in Nowhere Land); hmemade torch (for fending off hungry wolves wanting to eat your hubby); shredded cloth (for creating a makeshift tourniquet when lethally bitten by a snake); knife (for any do-it-yourself surgeries that might arise—don't forget to sterilize!); divorce papers (for serving to the spouse who told you the trip was a fab idea).

The verdict: If you get all giddy over "Man vs. Wild"–type stories, this is your flick. Once their trek goes nutso, Nick and Lori find themselves pelted with all sorts of nightmarish scenarios—some of it predictable (begone, evil wolves, begone!), some of it not (you'll wanna keep that knife verrrry handy). It's nothing that we haven't already seen before in one survivor story or another, whether it involves an ocean ("Open Water") or a mountain ("Into the Wild"). This one delivers some decent scares, aided by two attractive leads and dramatic shots that underscore just how freakishly teeny-tiny people can be when lost in the Grand Canyon. But really, "The Canyon" just ends up feeling like a direct-to-video release that—like our newlyweds—seems to have gotten lost on the way to its actual destination.

Did you know? In an interview with SplatterFilms.com, director Richard Harrah revealed that because of the Grand Canyon's strict guidelines for film crews, most of the movie was actually shot in the Mojave Desert.

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