Proud to be an American (restaurant). Or not.

American Girl Café

Signs at American Girl Café (609 Fifth Ave.) politely ask families with “children wearing Crocs” to use the elevators rather than the escalators as they make their way to the third floor café. Safety comes first, and pink-hued everything comes second at this fantasy land for doll-lovers the world over.

Proud to be an American?
It’s easy to be cynical when you step inside an entire department store dedicated to prepubescent capitalist consumption (there’s a café, theater, photo studio and DOLL HAIR SALON!), but the tea-room atmosphere, cute mini hamburgers and hot dogs, and a Victory Garden chocolate-mousse flowerpot put genuine smiles on little girls’ faces—and who can hate on that?

Spangled-star rating: 3
Is there anything more American than overprotective Croc warnings? Plus, at least American Girl dolls come with educational American history novels, not a questionable lesson in the perfect body type (thanks, Barbie).