(Credit: Frank Micelotta / FOX)
It wasn’t all bad, though: Ryan filled us in who’ll be stepping in as celebrity mentors this season, and the roster ranges from the awesome (Dolly Parton), to the unstable (Mariah Carey), to the creepy (Andrew Lloyd Weber), to the—oh wait, even more awesome (Neil Diamond). The inevitable David Archuleta and Dolly Parton giggle-fest is almost too exciting to handle, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Here’s what went down in week 10.
The judges’ table
Simon's harshest slam: Mr. Cowell reserved his sharpest barb for the producers this week, when Beatles Redux proved too much and he questioned the decision-making that went into the theme. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you, Simon.
Randy’s most repetitive comment: Randy dropped the term “cooliosis” on Tuesday, which Urban Dictionary defines as the "state of being infected with cool." Luckily, Randy remains immune.
Least intelligible Paula-ism: “You know what, you chose to use the voice box in a very cool way. You could probably get a GEICO commercial now. GEICO commercials are next.” Waaaah? Apparently she’s ready to shill brands that aren’t even sponsoring the show.
The good, the bad and the pitchy
The frontrunners: David Archuleta may not be infallible, but he sure can pull himself together. Idol’s golden boy came back into good graces this week. David Cook and Jason Castro were not as solid as they'd been, but they’re shaping up to be Archuleta’s strongest competitors.
The dark horses: Were this a contest to determine the next Sesame Street Muppet or host of a TLC home improvement show, Brooke White would have it in the bag. But she needs to cut the Mary Sunshine bit pronto if she wants to be a singer. As for powerhouses Syesha and Carly, both have now been humbled by the bottom three. The shocker should keep them safe for a few more weeks, but it doesn’t speak highly of their fan bases.
Who’s going next: Kristy Lee Cook has promised to blow us out of our socks if given another chance, but these empty promises are becoming less convincing. Simon’s tenth place prophecy is one week away from coming to fruition.
Whoever goes next week gets almost zero stage time on the tour, so come back to see who’ll have the easiest summer job ever!
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